Judge
Judy: Settling Family Feuds In Small Claims Court
18 December 2009By Jane Stillwater
Matt Tabbai says that the reason that Sarah Plain is
so popular is because she whines a lot and makes
everything personal. Heck, I can whine a lot and make
everything personal too! I got skills. I´ve been
trained by the best -- a dysfunctional family that has
been dysfunctional for whole generations. Palin has
nothing on me. I can whine with the best of them.
Here´s a great example -- my family´s latest episode
of dysfunctionality. However, since one of my family
members just married a high-powered lawyer, let´s all
pretend that this story isn´t about me. Okay?
"Once upon a time there as a kind old man who died
suddenly without making a valid will -- thus leaving
his greedy family to fight over the pickings. However,
he did have sense enough to give his daughter -- who
might or might not have been me -- signing privileges
on his bank account, worth approximately $60,000, and
to give his second oldest granddaughter, who we will
now call ´Sapphire´, joint bank account privileges
also -- in order to avoid probate."
"How long is this story going to go on, Jane," you
might ask. "Get to the point."
"Okay. Pop died. Sapphire took the joint bank accounts
all for herself. And also the $30,000 Oppenheimer
fund. And also the new car. But then the kind old
man´s other daughter dragged the whole dysfunctional
family through probate court anyway. (You can´t get
much more dysfunctional than that!)
Then the court awarded Pop´s oldest daughter $23,000
and his youngest daughter -- possibly me -- $27,000,
all that was left of the estate after Sapphire took
the car, the bank accounts and the Oppenheimer.
Despite Pop´s wishes that the accounts be used to help
put his younger grandchildren through college,
Sapphire was definitely not going to share those.
You got the picture so far? Well, there´s more.
After the probate case closed, Sapphire came up to her
mother with tears in her eyes and shamelessly begged
her for the rest of the money. "If you give me your
$27,000 now too, I can buy a new house and then later
I will pay you back by helping to put my younger
sister and brother through college." Let´s call the
younger siblings, er, Ashley and Joe.
Now what real mother could possibly turn down all
those tears? Not me.
However. Ten long years passed and Sapphire showed NO
signs of helping either Joe or Ashley through college.
She did at one time write one check for $4,000 in
order to pay Joe back for money she owed him for some
other reason -- but her check bounced.
"Now that you own a house, have a well-paying job in
the movie industry, have ´married up,´ etc," said the
poor naive mother, it's´s time to start paying the
$27,000 that you owe me back."
"What money? What debt? What promise?" responded
Sapphire. "I have no idea what you are talking about."
So. What is a mother to do? Sue the freak out of her
daughter of course! I bet that´s what Sarah Palin
would have done.
Seeing as how Sapphire´s husband is a high-powered
lawyer, the only option then facing the poor mom was
to take the daughter to small claims court instead of
superior court.
So she did.
The poor sweet mom may not win this case because she
would have to ask Joe and Ashley and the mom´s sister
and brother-in-law and Sapphire´s uncle and great aunt
and first husband to testify against Sapphire -- and
the mom was hesitant to do that.
"Why?"
"Because everyone in the family seems to be afraid of
crossing Sapphire." I would be too! "And also because
this family is already dysfunctional enough already
and dragging ALL of them into court is only going to
make it worse." Oh.
But there will still be some small satisfaction for
the mom in knowing that "Sapphire" hasn´t completely
gotten away with lying to her own mother for money.
Plus what if the mom´s case wins? Then she would at
least get some of her money back -- $7,500 of the
money that she spent paying off young Ashley´s college
loan.
Plus it is rather pathetic but true that going to
court might be the only way that the poor mom might
ever get to see her second daughter -- and her first
grandchild -- ever again.
So I, er, I mean, the poor sweet mom, just filed this
case in small claims court.
But, wait! There´s even more!
Judge Judy´s spies just discovered this case in the
records of the Berkeley courthouse and asked both the
mother and the daughter if they would come on the
show. The mom, of course, said, "Wow! Sign me up!" But
who knows what the daughter will say?
I can clearly imagine what Judge Judy might say about
this mess, however. "Mom, you were a complete idiot
not to get a written contract but, on the other hand,
if you can´t trust the word of your own daughter to
help out her own sister and brother in need even when
she can well afford it, then who CAN you trust!"
PS: Maybe Sarah Palin should take Levi Johnston to
small claims court and they too can sort out their
family feud on Judge Judy.
PPS: I´m still down here in Chile. My father was a Lt.
Commander in the U.S. Navy and was always talking
about when he took an aircraft carrier ride to
Valparaiso back in the 1950s. So here is a short video
of Valparaiso -- in honor of my Pop: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_2orPC3O7pU
And when I was a kid, my mother always used to drag me
off to antique stores -- so here´s a video of the
ultimate antique collection. It´s in Nueuva Braunau,
in Patagonia, a German settlement founded way up in
the Chilean Andes in 1853. Mom, this one is for you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OK2KToVzO-s
My mom died in 1989, but if she is in Heaven, I´m sure
that her versing of it will look a lot like this
museum.
©
EsinIslam.Com
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