Advice And Guidelines For Someone Who
Cannot Mix With People And Prefers To Stay Home Alone
Islamic Rulings - Living Shariah Verdicts
Islamic Questions & Answers
I cannot bear to mix with people and I prefer
to be alone. I feel that I am in a state of distress
when I mix with others. The Messenger (blessings and
peace of Allah be upon him) commanded us to pray in
the mosque. What should I do? I would rather not pray
than pray in the mosque.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
The situation you are in does not only have to do with
praying in the mosque, rather it has to do with other
duties which require you to go out of the house, such
as upholding ties of kinship, earning money so that
you can live, seeking knowledge, enjoining what is
good, forbidding what is evil, and so on.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on
him) said:
The fact of the matter is that mixing may sometimes be
obligatory or mustahabb. An individual may be enjoined
to mix with others sometimes and to remain alone
sometimes. That depends on the purpose. If mixing with
others is for the purpose of cooperating in
righteousness and piety, then it is enjoined; but if
it is for the purpose of cooperating in sin and
transgression, then it is forbidden. Mixing with
Muslims is a kind of worship, as in the case of the
five daily prayers, Jumu'ah, Eid, eclipse prayers,
prayers for rain and so on. This is something that
Allah and His Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah
be upon him) have enjoined. The same applies to mixing
with them on Hajj and when fighting the kuffaar and
rebels, even if the leaders of that are evildoers and
even if there are some evildoers among the people
involved.
The same applies to being involved in gatherings that
increase a person's faith, either because he benefits
from these gatherings or he can benefit others, and so
on.
Majmoo' al-Fataawa, 10/425
Thus you can see that the way you are is something
that is not pleasing to the Lord of the Worlds, and
you have to look again at the situation and realise
that what you are doing is a trick from the shaytaan
who is making your situation and your bad deed look
good to you. Beware of him and his tricks, and get
ready to fight him, and trust that your Lord will help
you by granting victory against him.
Secondly:
If you feel distress when mixing with people, then we
can be certain that you will never be better off on
your own or in isolation. Rather the wolf eats the
sheep that wanders off from the flock and the shaytaan
overpowers those who are solitary and do not have
helpers to help them obey their Lord or supporters who
will support them against the shaytaan and his troops.
Even if you find some annoyance in mixing with people,
that mixing, if you bear it with patience, is still
better than not mixing. The Prophet (blessings and
peace of Allah be upon him) praised the one who mixes
with people and bears their annoyance with patience.
It was narrated that Ibn ‘Umar said: The Messenger of
Allaah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him)
said: "The believer who mixes with people and bears
their annoyance with patience will have a greater
reward than the one who does not mix with people and
does not put up with their annoyance." Narrated by al-Tirmidhi
(5207) and Ibn Maajah (4032).
Moreover, there is no reason for your isolation and
you do not have -- as far as we can see -- any
justification for which we would encourage you to
remain like that. We feel that any isolation which
results in you not praying jumu'ah for prayers in
congregation is not acceptable and we do not encourage
it.
Some of the reasons for isolation include total
corruption of people, lack of people to support you in
adhering to the truth, each person admiring his own
opinion, and lack of benefit in sincerely advising
people. By Allah's grace, none of these are applicable
in Muslim societies or even in kaafir societies. We
have heard of thousands of kuffaar who are entering
the religion of Allah all the time, and we hear of
others like them, sinners who have begun to follow the
path of guidance. Indeed we find that people are
thirsting for those who will quench their thirst and
they are hungry for those who will feed them, in
spiritual terms of goodness and guidance.
As for your justification for isolation, namely shar'i
knowledge, we do not think this is the case. You are
preferring isolation to the kind of mixing that is
obligatory, so if you are neglecting Islamic duties
because of this isolation of yours, what kind of sha'i
knowledge do you have so that we could tell you to
keep away from people and focus on obeying your Lord
and preserving your religious commitment? Hence Abu
Sulaymaan al-Khattaabi (may Allah have mercy on him)
said: Isolation only benefits scholars and wise men,
but it is the most harmful of things for the ignorant.
And he narrated from Ibraaheem that he said to
Mugheerah: Acquire deep understanding of Islam, then
you can isolate yourself.
See: al-‘Azlah by al-Khattaabi, p. 225
Thirdly:
As you have written to us -- and we appreciate that --
this means that you are still holding on to a thread
and the beginning of the right way to bring you out of
this fatal loneliness. You have entered the world of
the Internet, which is millions of times greater than
your small world that you have forsaken. In this vast
world there is far more evil than in your forsaken
world. So beware of that, for how much temptation it
has caused to righteous people and how much evil it
has caused to righteous and chaste women.
Strive to do the acts of worship which Allah has
enjoined on you, first and foremost among which is
praying in congregation in the mosque. In the answer
to question number 120 you will find the evidence for
this duty. You also have to earn permissible income so
as to protect your dignity and spare you from having
to ask of people, and so that you can honour your
parents and take care of them and help them to buy
what they need or help them to get to the places they
want to go, and uphold ties of kinship with your
family and relatives.
You should remember that this world will never be free
of hardships, worries and distress. If you want a
place where there is none of these things, with
complete happiness and ease, a good life and the
pleasure of Allah, then you will find that in the
Paradise of Allah in the Hereafter. So strive for that
Day and rid yourself of that which may cause you
distress in this world by reducing your involvement in
it; ask Allah to help you to attain that, and remember
that isolating oneself is nothing more than being
alone with the Shaytaan, and it will only bring you
more worries and distress. Do you not see that the
punishment of imprisonment is painful for the free
man, and the worst form of it is solitary confinement?
So how can you prefer for yourself that which
prisoners would sacrifice that which is most dear to
them in order to escape?
We ask Allah to guide you to the truth and to help you
to follow the path of the righteous among His slaves;
were it not for the fact that Allah decreed that they
should mix with people and establish acts of worship,
we and you would not have known Islam or had the
honour of belonging to it. So become one of the troops
of Islam, wield your weapon in the face of your
shaytaan and make up for what you have missed by
striving hard and doing acts of worship on a solid
basis.
And Allah is the source of strength.
©
EsinIslam.Com
Add Comments