If He Said To His Wife: "Go Back To Your Father's House," Does That Count As A Divorce (Talaaq)?
Islamic Rulings -
Living Shariah Verdicts
Islamic Questions & Answers
I had a misunderstanding with my wife last week and it got to the extent that
she requested me to tell her that "I DIVOURCE YOU THRICE". She continued telling
me this repeatedly until I said to her that "PACK YOUR LOAD TO YOUR FAMILY HOUSE
WHEN YOU GET BACK TO OUR COUNTRY". We are both presently outside our country but
she will return to our country on Wednesday. I actually did not know that
implied (implicit) statement of divource is equivalent to divource before I made
the statement. Furthermore, during the argument, I was repeating this statement
but I can't remember the number of times I told her. However, I am very sure it
is more than once. I was not counting because I thought the statement of divorce
in Islam has to be explicit like saying that "You are divorced". I will also
like to point it out that my wife is presently pregnant. I want to know whether
there is divorce between us or not. And does she have to marry another person
and get divorced before I can marry her again. I will appreciate if the answer
is properly justified with Quran, Hadith or any other Islamic reference.
Praise be to Allah.
We advise you to treat your wife kindly and to overlook some of the things that
you dislike from her. The wise woman should also treat her husband in like
manner, for the absence of love and compassion between the spouses, and failing
to follow the example of the Prophet's behaviour with his family or to give
others their rights, and allowing anger to prevail, are causes that will turn
family life into an unbearable hell. Rather relationships should be based on
kindness, overlooking mistakes, remembering good qualities, and knowing that the
home and the family should be a place of stability and calm, so that the burdens
of life will be easier to cope with.
The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: "The best of you is
the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives." Narrated
by at-Tirmidhi (3895) and Ibn Maajah (1977); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in
And the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: "I instruct you
to treat women well." Narrated by al-Bukhaari (3331) and Muslim (1468).
Imam Muslim narrated in his Saheeh (1469) that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be
pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be
upon him) said: "No believing man should hate a believing woman. If he dislikes
one of her characteristics, he may be pleased with another."
An-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said concerning the meaning of this
hadith: He should not hate her, because if he finds in her a characteristics
that he dislikes, he will find another that pleases him, such as if she is
bad-tempered but is religiously committed, or beautiful, or chaste, or kind to
him, and so on.
End quote from Sharh Muslim (10/58)
Your saying to your wife: "Pack your load to your family house when you get back
to our country" and similar phrases that do not implicitly state divorce are
called by the scholars "metaphors for divorce", and a metaphor may be
interpreted as referring to divorce or as referring to something else.
The ruling on such phrases is that it depends on the intention of the husband;
if he intended (when uttering these words) to issue a divorce, then his divorce
counts as such, but if he had no such intention, then it does not count as such.
Shaykh Muhammad ibn 'Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
The correct view is that the metaphor does not count as a divorce unless it was
intended as such, because a person may say (to his wife): "Get out" and the
like, out of anger, with no intention of divorce at all; he only wants her to
get out of his face until their anger cools off… Whatever the case, the correct
view is that no divorce has occurred unless it was intended. End quote.
Ash-Sharh al-Mumti' (13/76)
Based on that, so long as you did not intend divorce, no divorce occurred as a
result of the words you mentioned.